The adventures of Almigo

I was just replying to my 2765th work email of the day when my mobile went off displaying 'Private number'. When this happens, it's usually one of three possible callers - a) My mum b) the boss or c) that damn Hotel I stayed at back in 1998 that still wants me to sign up to their loyalty program where I get a free mint on my pillow for every $100 I spend, regardless of the fact that I haven't set foot in the place since 1998. Rated 5 stars in Dirtbag Reviews No this time around it was from Skynet. Whoops, I mean my local telecommunications service. And after it was over I'd have much rather have chatted to the machines hell bent on John Conner and all humanities destruction...

AL DENTED If you're one of those people who sideswipe or damage other people's cars and don't leave a note, I hope someone comes along and kicks you in the private parts as hard as possible without prior notification. Because its a horrible thing arriving at your car to find some clown has dented your pride and joy and sped off without leaving any details. From my radio show this morning, seems I'm not the only one fed up by these antics. A plague upon your houses! My car might look like a wreck (and it does) but if anyone's going to damage, it's going to be me.