Monday, May 28, 2012

100 interesting facts about Nicki Minaj!

Nicki who?

Nicki Minaj! No, not Nicole Mirage or a Nipponese Massage, Nicki Minaj! Thus:


Are you a big fan of Necrosis Triage Nicki Minaj? Well you'll love these 100 amazing facts we've dug up about her!

1. The name Minaj does not mean 'Free car parking space' in German.
2. Nicki Minaj did not attend Camberwell High School.
3. There's a fair chance that Nicki Minaj has never actually been to Camberwell, let alone Camberwell High School.
4. She never had a fish called Wanda
5. Putting her in your gas tank will not increase your mileage.
6. Nicki Minaj does not fit into a fuel tank
7. She didn't leave the cake out in the rain, regardless of how long it took to bake and the fact that you'll never have that recipe again.
8. She wasn't hidden behind the grassy gnoll when JFK was killed.
9. The Beatles song 'Help' does not not have a hidden message to make you buy her album
10. Nicki Minaj doesn't look like Adele

Not Adele
11. She has never appeared in an episode of Acropolis Now
12. Nicki Minaj didn't put the drugs in Chapelle Corby's boogie board bag
13. The surname Minaj doesn't contain a silent Q
14. Bill Gates hasn't bought any of her albums
15. Neither has Bill Cosby
16. Or Bill Paxton for that matter.
17. Bill Murray on the other hand might have, he never got back to us when we called to check.
18. Nicki Minaj has never covered the immortal classic 'So Cold in the D' by T Baby
19. E=MC2 has nothing to do with Nicki. It's the theory of relativity of course.
20. Delta Goodream once sang a song. Nicki has also done this at least once.
21. She isn't related to Flo Rida's favourite Netball.
22. She wears nail polish.
23. On her nails, not in her eyes.
24. Mike Tyson has never fought Nicki Minaj in a boxing match. That we know of.
25. In the movie series 'Police Academy', Nicki Minaj doesn't have a cameo as a police siren

Nicki Nimoy
26. Just like her first name, the word 'Neutral' also starts with the letter N
27. Nicki Minaj doesn't know how to freeze Nexgen
28. She probably couldn't tell you all the elements on the periodic table
29. Contrary to popular beleif, she's not 9 foot 6.
30. The Tea Party's 'Fire in the head' is not about Nicki Minaj.
31. She doesn't own an early 90's Nissan Pulsar
32. She doesn't call her boobs 'Walter and Terry', nor her ass 'Gerald'
33. She doesn't know where Jimmy Hoffa's body is hidden
34. Nicki Minaj didn't kill Laura Palmer
35. I dated a girl called Nicki once. Not this girl though.
36. She hasn't dated Shia Lebouf
37. Or Malcolm McDowell.
38. If you cut her open she would bleed all over the place. Therefore it is not reccomended that you cut her open unless you are a surgeon performing life saving Nicki Minaj surgery.
39. Her brother is not Hulk Hogan
40. She never won the WWF Heavyweight title
41. Her favourite drink is usually served in liquid form.
42. The things growing out of her scalp are called 'hairs'
43. She has never toured Colac.
44. As a child growing up, Nicki Minaj was a child growing up. She wasn't a tricycle that got struck by lightning sprung to life.
45. There is no powered protien supplement currently called 'Minaj muscles'
46. She doesn't race greyhounds as first thought
47. She doesn't following Collingwood in the AFL
48. If you asked her what AFL stood for, she'd probably reply with a blank stare.
49. If you play her songs backwards, I still wouldn't listen
50. The album 'Decksndrumsnrocknroll' by the Propellerheads is truly awesome and in the immortal words of Molly Meldrum, 'Do yourself a favor' and buy two copies. One for you of course and one for Nicki as she's probably never heard of them before.

Tricky Minaj
51. There's no truth to the rumour that she gets all of her meals served by catapault.
52. She isn't any relation to the Transformer 'Ironhide'
53. If you punch her you'll probably get charged with assault
54. Wrestler Randy Orton does not have a tattoo of Nicki Minaj on his inner thigh
55. Pink Friday Roman Reloaded has nothing to do with Emporer Hadrian.
56. Nicki Minaj has not written a song about Netballs (yet)
57. Or a song about James May (Sadly)
58. Nicki Minaj never invaded Poland
59. In the movie 'Blood Diamond' featuring Leonardo Di Caprio, a 'Blood Diamond' is not African Slang for 'Nicki Minaj'
60. If you translated the name Nicki Minaj into Japanese and then spoke that to someone who didn't speak Japanese, you'd struggle to get the wanted reaction out of them that you intended.
61. Nicki Minaj is not a school subject no matter how much you want to beleive.
62. Justin Beiber's movie is called 'Never Say Never'. If Nicki Minaj ever made a movie, it wouldn't be called 'Never say never' as that's copywright infringement.
63. The butler did it. Nicki didn't see the butler do it though.
64. One of the Chemical Brothers isn't Nicki. Neither's the other one.
65. The Mitsubishi Mirage has nothing to do with Nicki Minaj.
66. You can't blame Nicki Minaj for the Carbon Tax in Australia
67. Indonesia has the most volcanos. Nicki doesn't live in one.
68. Rice is a crop that grows in paddy fields. Nicky Minaj has eaten rice before.
69. She hasn't won the Tour De France
70. Or the Paris to Dakkar rally.

Mitsubishi Mirage
71. Porn Star Ron Jeremy does not yell out 'Nicki Minaj!' when he finishes a scene
72. If we sent a Nicki Minaj cd into space, it'd probably still be there in the future
73. Nicki Minaj would probably not survive nuclear armageddon
74. Birds are also something along with Starships that were meant to fly
75. Nicki Minaj has never visited Almigo's Adventures
76. The secret ingredient of a Mai Thai is not Nicki Minaj
77. She has never studied Marine Biology
78. Her dad wasn't Andre the Giant
79. She didn't go to school with Peter Andre
80. 'Nicki Minaj' is not a legitimate sporting injury
81. She weighs more than the average duck
82. Her net worth is more than a box of paperclips
83. The song 'Hurricane' by Bob Dylan is about Ruben Carter, not Nicki Minaj as usually debated.
84. Has she ever been on a bus? Logic says yes, at least once.
85. She wasn't born in Edinborough
86. The first line of the bible doesn't read 'Starships were meant to fly'
87. When she was born the moon did not turn a firey red
88. If she stands up next to a mountain, she couldn't chop it down with the edge of her hand.
89. She doesn't play for the Chicago Bulls
90. Her favourite car of all time isn't a 1989 Mazda Rx7 with missing paint
91. She can't set fire to the rain. Only Adele can.
92. If you plug Nicki Minaj into your computers USB port, the computer won't recognize her.
93. If you hide her in a giant chicken suit, most people won't recognize her either.
94. Nicki Minaj doesn't fit in a typical USB port.
95. Nicki Minaj was not born under a bad sign with a blue moon in her eye.
96. Nicki Minaj herself won't fit in a Cd-rom drive, but her cd might (unconfirmed)
97. You can't plug a keyboard or mouse into Nicki Minaj
98. Nicki Minaj is not the secret mother on How I Met Your Mother
99. Tom Hanks has never played Nicki Minaj in any movie.
100. Nicki Minaj will probably never read this list.

Consider your mind blown!

 Hey did you know Nicki has her own fragrance? It probably smells like Annacondas and you can check it out here!:.


1 comment:

  1. Comments removed due to a couple of 9 year olds having a big whinge.

    Remember kids, don't like it? Don't read it!

    Regular programming will now be resumed :D


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