Tuesday, April 24, 2018

Lord of the (dead) flies.

Warning: If you don't like dogs and even more so the poo they produce, then this post is not for you. No it's not a trick, I'm not trying to warn you away and then reward those that hang about with amazing pictures of gorgeous women - this post involves dog poo.

Who's a good doggie?

Courtesy of our lovable family border collie Savannah.

Right, fair warning sent out, on with the post!

So where we are there's beautiful sunshiny days and plenty of flies to boot. Lots and lots of flies. They get inside the house, kamikaze into my coffee (no idea why, there's rarely anything sweet in there) and basically make a nuisance of themselves to we either swat them, spray them or they die of boredom watching me play Fallout 4.

In a nutshell they are a frustrating pest and therefore must be eliminated.

Your days on this planet are numbered. Even less so than your already terrible life span.
So I decided to try my hand at some meticulously built (put together in less than two minutes) home made fly traps or as I like to call it Flykiller Extreme 2000. 
(I'd like to take credit for this idea but I found it on Google - still you can always paint them up and make them look stylish in your unique way I guess. Depends on how lavish you want your fly eradication system to be.)

First thing you'll need is a spare plastic bottle. A 2 liter one would be ideal but we have plenty of these 600ml bottles begging to be re-purposed so I used a couple of these instead.

A simple cut around near the top and flip things up to start our fly devastation trap ways.

Wait, am I cleaning my trap already? Nay, a squirt of this with the water we'll add in a sec creates a slimy obstacle course game show like experience for any fly stupid enough to go for a cool dip after sampling the prize inside.
Something akin to this really:

(Apparently the liquid sticks to the wings and makes it even tougher escaping..)

Now we'll need something smelly, enticing and absolutely irresistible to the horde of buzzing flies out the back. Something in vast supply...something Savannah is a master at producing. You'll know which one the picky flies like best by the vast armies crawling all over it when you scoop it up and pop into your trap.

Sure ain't pretty but lets be honest here. it's a shit trap for flies. Literally.
Now after about an hour, there was one fly buzzing around in each trap. Another hour later and each doomed fly had a friend. To speed up the process, I sweetened the deal.

You know what they say - you get more flies (to crawl into your carefully crafted trap and die) with honey.
I'm happy to report that they really enjoyed that dog excrement with honey notes and after one day, about 25 of the nasty buggers had met their doom.

The next day? A carpet of black winged bodies filled the trap. Glorious. The traps were carefully bagged and placed in the bin.

So less flies outside which means less flies inside, less poo to step in and it's win win all round! Let me know if you're inspired to make your own and how effective your fly genocide machine ends up being!


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