Bash for the Border - Round 4 - Heavy lies the head that wears the crown.

So this week I've decided to award the captaincy of the Flavorless Flav's on merit and not to the first guy that rocked up to the club rooms (sorry Bont), plus I've made the first player trade with another coach in the history of me playing this game, swapping an inconsistent Cat for a Magpie. Let's see what happens from here!

MEET THE NEW CAPTAIN, BEST ON GROUND

The Captaincy is a new thing this year - you nominate a player as Captain of the team and whatever score he gets is doubled because hey,  he's Captain. Now because Bont was the very first player picked for this rag tag bunch of champions, he automatically gained the crown which he's proudly been wearing for the last three rounds.

Which is why he's been represented by top dude Horus Lupercal here

However after three rounds, it's dawned on me that as good as Captain Bontempelli has been, he has not been my highest scoring player. Which means I'm short changing myself on some possible game changing points. According to the full player list, my top gun for the Flav's so far has been...

Good ole McGovern aka the Birdman Corax

(Going into round 4, Bont is actually my third best player score wise, behind Hurn and with Pendlebury nipping at his heels)

So McGovern is Captain this week and the weeks after that he stays on top. Should be an interesting season if we have a few captaincy changes based on scoring..

FAREWELL TO THE HAWK. ER, CAT

Like a Katy Perry song, Hawkins has been hot and cold for me and after coffee with fellow Coach Brand Power, I finally agreed to my very first coached team to team trade. We say to the inconsistent:

HAWKINS - OUT

Hilariously the twin personalities of Alpharious seem to fit Hakwins time with this team perfectly.

And welcome in:

STEELE SIDEBOTTOM - MID/FWD - IN

Represented by: Abaddon the Destroyer

While not the highest scoring player around, at least he's fairly consistent. Plus he's another of those dual role players that come in so handy when injuries run through your team. 
And how good is his name full stop? Welcome aboard Steele!

THE AFTERNOON BEFORE ROUND 4 GETS UNDERWAY

And according to the AFL medical room, there's a couple of niggles and possible recoveries I wasn't aware of until I gave the lengthy report the look over.

Pittonet RUC - May just be out with a back injury still. Not a pressing issue because I've swapped him out for Naitanui this week. 

Lever DEF - May come good just in time this week and so I've taken the risk and swapped him on field for Byrne-Jones

Allir - No longer a player in my squad but still out for a good two to three weeks, so thankfully I made the trade early. 

Martin FWD - Still out on personal leave. Return TBC. Both the Tigers and the Flavorless Flav's need his magic but in the meantime at least new recruit Steele Sidebottom can take his place.

Amazingly with all of the injuries and covid protocols the poor Eagles have had to cop over the last few weeks, none of mine are affected. This bodes well for hopefully another amazing performance from our new captain.

So after all those changes Alpha-Delta, how we looking?

Calculating...

ERROR. Predictor not working through Supercoach site. Additional data required.

Hmm, how strange. Is it because Lever has a score of zero and no history to speak of this season? Is that why it's glitching? Oh well, hopefully we'll get a better indication of how effective my latest setup will be soon enough.

GAME TIME!

And wouldn't you know it? Putting Lever back into play was a disaster with a low low low low 30 points. Of course Bryne-Jones had a great time on the bench with 78. It might be time to say goodbye to the Booty Man here because he hasn't done me any favors..

Still, plenty more games left to go this round so here's hoping things don't get worse from here...

Edit: Apparently Hawkins had a great game too not playing for me. Always the way isn't it? You're still not coming back anytime soon though..

THE REST OF THE GAMES OF AFL ROUND 4

To give us the low down on the wash of Round 4, it's over to you Alpha Delta...

er...Alpha Delta?

Oh hey there pardner, you looking for that little floating robot skull thing?

Yes, yes I was. And you are?

Donny Dealer is my name sunshine, wheeler, dealer, champion of your next car bargain of the century. You just tell me what you're looking for and I'll bet mah hat we can conjure up just what you need. And by the looks of you, you're in the market for a good ole panel van yeah?

No, I'm good for cars thanks Desmond. Now what are you doing here and what happened to Alpha Delta exactly?

That's Donny there sunshine, with deals so hot you won't be forgetting my name or the lot on Bargain Avenue for a very long time to come. Anyhoos that floatin skull critter went off a blippin and a beeping to have his timing chain pulled and a coolant wash of the old airbags or some such.

And so I figured you being short of an expert around these pages, well you could definitely use the timely word or two from the renowned Donny Dealer here and so I've volunteered my time and old fashioned know how to get you what you need. And while I do this, why don't you peruse my line of panel vans in stock? There's a purple 74 in the corner over there that has your name on it! Try it on for size, see what you think now..

No wait, I don't need a panel van and I don't need you-

Goooooooood golly christ our savoir amen, wasn't round four fulla action! Just like the cars on my lot, every single one of them dripping in all those optional extras you want - like wind down windows and natural air vent conditioning systems.

I see we've already covered the Lever debacle and had that floating skully thingy still been a floatin around I'm sure he woulda beeped something shocking to trade that lemon Ford Pinto out of the team already but anyhoos, let's move on and take a look at some of the stand out performances. 
Kinda like the sports cars I have in store for you at the lot, remember: When the smoke clears, you'll enjoy motoring for years! 

The good times start with the latest captain in McGovern - 184 points for the Fabulous Freebirds and wowee, did they need it!

Er, that's the Flavorless Flavs by the way...

Whatever you say there sunshine. Former captain the Bont, he did well too. Like a road trip where you don't have to play 'guess the burning fluid', he delivered like a car from Donny Dealer should, straight down the line. 136 points.

Credit where credit is due and yes we do have finance here by the way, reliable Pendlebury did it again with 110. Then you've got some great performances from the likes of McDonald redeeming himself with 101 and Naitanui on 96. 

But like trade ins that take advantage of my vast generosity, not all deals fall my way and not every player came to play if you get my drift. (Come to think of it I'm sure I've got a couple of cars here reading to do just that, as in drift, come on down!) 
Buddy cooled off with 42 and Hurn with 46. Sidebottom only managed 66.

Byrne-Jones and Dangerfield both scored 70...from the bench. You always put your good deals out the front there coach!

But amazingly as poor as some of the performances were (like what you buy from my opposition!) this round ended up down to the wire. Both coaches had one game left, both coaches had one player left to score and the difference between the pair of combatants, a mere 4 pointseroonies!

In the end though? It was the might and power (like one of my V6's now available) from Swallow taking on Fiorini for the Freebirds that proved too much, the birds norrowly missing out by a mere 22 points...

But hey, you won't miss out on the car bargain of your dreams when you shop at Donny Dealers!

RESULT: LOSS (JUST)

Nail bitingly close really, especially as first and last on the ladder (Tyson and Guy respectively) landed a draw for their match up. 
I know, I know. Had I not gambled with Lever, I might be celebrating again this week. But on that, no need to work out who I'm trading out next..

TO BE CONTINUED...