The Coach with the most! Ep 8: The team spa now smells like a brewery

 Don't mind us, we're still in party mode after last week..

Even Mantaur and Disco got a little carried away after breaking our victory drought and are still a little 'tiddly' today after a huge night on the party juice.

I said Moooooo bitch, get out the hay, get out the hay...hic!

Yooooooooouuuuuu, make me feeeeeeelllllllllll like daaaaaaaaancing...

Although it's business as usual for Wallstreet who turned up for two cheeky Chardonnay's and then exited early.

I'd appreciate some more chips and dips when you put on an event like this again in future. Also I feel I need to point out that my desk is a not a bed and therefore not a good place for Hickey to sleep off the drink..

Duly noted, now pass the aspirin. There's no other business needed for today as we all recover (apart from fishing out all the beer bottles currently choking up the team recovery spa and working out how to get Dusty out of that tree. Footy business resumes tomorrow!

TAUNT LOOKING TUESDAY

 Boss, we've got a trade offer from Tim. He's keen on taking Zorko off your hands.

Well that'd be the way wouldn't it? Zorko gets back to performing like he should and suddenly other coaches come sniffing around. I took a brief look at Josh Kelly who Tim was offering up and there wasn't anything there that made this worth the punt.

But he's about to take off! - Tim

Sure. And my meagre haul of Bitcoin is going to grow so large I'll be drowning in Lambos. That's a no deal Tim! Zorko lives to kick the footy around for Team Migo for another round.

I've also noticed that since I've been writing about Supercoach and my footy team, Google has been sprinkling through a few more sporting ads on this blog. However:

...that's the completely wrong code being NRL instead of AFL. (For non footy fans that would be like doing a blog dedicated completely to Ferrari's and Google decides to populate it with ads all bout Lamborghinis.) Still, it's a start..

New opponent Wednesday

My next challenge Tyson swings by the office to chat all things trades, injuries and the fact that it's Team Tyson taking on Team Migo this round. He also casually drops the fact that he's sitting at the very top of the player ladder currently, which before my latest win would have me moaning more than an overacting porn star but now with a taste of victory, I relish the challenge. 2nd last versus top of the game? Bring that on!

Boss the Tigers have revealed that Dusty will be out of action for this Friday's clash against the Western Bulldogs. While a concussion has been ruled out, he does have a foot injury.

We'd invite Lambert back into the team to sub for him but he's got a calf strain.

Well that doesn't help now does it? The only FWD I have left to play is Membrey but I'm really not confident in him matching what Dusty can do (when working Dusty is an absolute machine) but Membrey fills the gap now until I can find a free agent with a better record: 

(I was looking at Darcy Cameron from Collingwood until I realised he's only played two games so far so they must be using him sparingly. Riley Thilthorpe from Adelaide was another option but he's only got one game to his record so far.) 

So it looks like Membrey stays where he is for now!

THE WEEKEND THAT WAS

(Before we get into the player report for this week, I want to send a massive shoutout to Baschar Houli. I watched him run riot in the brilliant game with the Bulldogs on Friday night and kicked myself for letting him go. Brilliant player, humble bloke, we wish him nothing but the best - even with him being in the team we take on this week.) 

Right, onto the performance report and...am I reading this right? We have a work experience kid doing this now? When did this happen?

Something to do with the AFL juniors program I think? It was either let a budding announcer try his hand at weekend reporting or host a weekend with 30 of them running riot around the club while you tried to teach them a thing or two.

I figured this was the lesser of two evils.

Hmm, fair point. Okay then, take it away Freddie Fartmonger! (Seriously, that's what he's calling himself??)

Thanks Alan and welcome to the play by play where we look at how each player went and I give you my thoughts, raw and unfiltered on the round just gone. Before I start I'd like to give a huge shoutout to mum and dad, my little brother Timmy and Grandma and Grandpa and my pet fish Rubblecakes and-

Yes yes, get on with it.

Take some chilling medication and send me the e-receipt Bill! Firstly lets look at Duryea and hooly dooley, is he worth the mooley? My big toe says no Joe as he brings in just a slumdogging non millionaire 32 points. On the other finger his team mate Dale is well and truly worth the fish fingers with a slobbering 112 points. Meanwhile the tigers were only set halfway on the microwave with Martin doing nothing, Nankervis on 77 and Edwards on 53.
53? Not worth a cup of pee in my book bag!

What? What are you trying to say here exactly? I'm not sure you're cut out for thi-

Point not taken knockers, let's continue. Meanwhile it's all BOLD instead of Gold up on the Coast as Ellis rocks the trellis with a planet shaking 143. Right behind his behind is Greenwood, ha ha WOOD! With 142. Pendlebury scores a nice looking 96 points which is a like an extra kit kat in your chocolate, thanks mum! Membrey probably stepped in some doo doo because he got just 71 but even worse, Jiath must have been hit with a huge bag of farts because he didn't do any good with only 49 points.

Do you reckon you could do this without the fart jokes?

Right oh Captain Fart! He he. Meanwhile Luggage Rack scored 117 which is great and Allir farts in with 116. Zorko the dorko stops playing Minecraft long enough to make 92 while Dawson is more of a Roblox player and scores 85 ring a dings. Which leaves farty fart pants Lever next who was a asleep at the circle and only knocks up 70 digidoobers.

Digi..what?

Meanwhile on the bench poo bum captain pants left Hickey and Sheed there which was totes cray stupid because they like scored 110 and 106. What a fart brain! Pffffffffffffffttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt!!!!!!!!!!

And yet I still won this round, so that's enough of you.

Yes, we won again!!!!!!!!!!!

Final score - Al tha Five Ten 1245 vs Tysonic Hedgehogs 1177

Two wins in a row? Unheard of! And yet my up and coming team did manage to beat his (badly injured) team. Can we make it a third next week as we march closer to another big round? Stay tuned as lock the work exp kid away and see what happens!